Dear Chad
by Imagination.Is.Fluid
Summary: My life passes by me as if an audience is watching it. But that is just it. I'm the only one watching.
1. Chapter 1

**Mary here! How are you guys. Well, I did not get 15 reviews but I got a lot of people alerting and faving! Thanks so much guys. So I want to send a shout-out to the people who have reviewed! Lets start;**

**briglee100:** I know its sad, but I'm happy you liked it!

**:** Hahaha, me too, I dont like Justin! Thanks for reviewing though.

**xheartxbreakerx211****:** Thank you so much! You are the first one to like any of my trailers!

**Poem Writing Sterling Lover:** Awww! Thanks! And yes, I am definitly gonna continue.

**Demi-Fan-Channy**: I'm really happy you watched my trailer and read the story PROMO. Yes, it is sad but that is the whole plot. Anyway, thanks again!

"Honey, honey open the door!"

"You have been in there for an hour!"

"Sonny, you are scaring me, baby please come out."

It has been like this for two hours now. My mum just wont stop calling for me. I dont think she leaves the bathroom door. If only she knew what her precious "America's Sweetheart" was doing in the bathroom…

_**A Week Earlier…**_

Sonny POV:

"You stupid little bitch!" Joe Lucas's voice rang through the house. He was on the bed, shirt off, laying on top of none other that Sonny Monroe. Me. On top of me. If the media found out about this, my whole career would be ruined. My mum would be so dissapointed. Tawni will never speak to me again. I would be fired from _So Random!_.

What would Chad think? If he saw my position right now. He would never look at my face again. But if only he could see I was forced. Joe's hips were pushing me hard on the rough fabric of the itchy bed. He had me pinned on the bed. And I was screaming like a little baby.

He had told met that tonight was going to be romantic. I believed him because I loved him Loved him. I dont love him anymore. Not anymore.

Sure Joe was abusive before. He told me what to wear, who to be friends with, who not to be friends with but I though he was just looking out for me. Yeah right! How stupid could you get Allison!

I call myself Allison because I'm not Sonny anymore. Yes, people call me Sonny but it is just not me. I'm not who I was before. Heck, I dont know who I am now. It is all wrong. Everything is wrong. Except Chad.

Chad Dylan Cooper is my best friend. And my one and only love. I am completely in love with the being called Chad. But he only sees me as a friend. The sad, lonely, depressed girl who _used_ to be all perky and fun.

Everyone has noticed a change in me. Marshall even offered me a week off, but I could not take it. I dont want to miss a show, going around like a zombie so the media wont realize something is up.

"Sonny, you are an asshole. Lighten up a bit bitch!" He forced his lips on me and started kissing me roughly. It was terrible. When I pulled away he slapped me. It hurt but what hurt more was my heart. Why was I even here?

"Stop it Joe! You know I told you I'm not ready, but you kept pushing me. Sorry, but were over." I started walking away, hoping to get out of here as fast as I could but something yanked my top off.

It was Joe. "Were over, when I say were over." That was it. I kicked him and made a run for it. "You bitch!" . His voice was dimming. Yes, I was out of there. That hell hole. My life.

When I got outside, I realized I came here with Tawni. Awesome! I dont have a ride back home and I cant walk back because I have no shoes and it is too far away. So, I'll just go back to the studio. But no, the guards wont let me in.

I start walking towards a big tree very far away from the Lucas household. I wish Chad was here. He would help me. I lay down under the tree and let sleep take over me.

**Soooooo? What did you guys think? Well, obviously I'm not gonna kill Sonny off too quickly because then the whole plot will be ruined. I just want to let you guys know the "Dear Chad" Sonny. I hope you liked it and please review!**

**-Mary**


	2. Chapter 2

**First of all….HAPPY 18'TH BDAY SELENA GOMEZ! We love love loveee you ( me and all her fans )! Secondly, sorry I took so much to update, I had writers block…..Thanx so much for the alerts, faves and reviews! I love you guys. I hope you enjoy this chapter. It might look like a filler buuuutttt….**

I woke up to find my self on the cold floor. No pillow, no blanket. Just me. I tried to remember last night. After I came out of the bathroom, wearing long sleeves of course, my mum started yelling at me. I told her I was taking a long shower, trying to relax and she bought it. Last year if someone told me to lie to my mum, that person was off my buddy list. Now, not only do I have to lie to my mum, but to everyone. The whole world. Even Chad. I got up off the floor, made my bed and got dressed. I tied my hair up in a ponytail and put a hair clip in the shape of a sun. Yeah, because that is exactly who I am! I went downstairs to find my mum asleep on the couch, mop in hand. I swear, she works too hard.

I got into my car and started to drive over to the studio for another day of pretending. I turned on the radio.

_**Tryna' make this work**_

_**But you act like a jerk**_

_**Silly of me to keep holdin' on**_

_**But the dumb's cap is off**_

_**You don't know what you've lost**_

Huh... Sounds like me and Joe. Joe Lucas. He broke me. He turned me into Allison. He abused me. I don't know who I am anymore.

I get to the studio parking lot to find Chad getting out of his car. I rush over to him and hug him.

"Ummm... Hey Sonny, nice to see you to?"

"Sorry Chad, its just that I don't feel too good...

Lie Allison, lie!

"I had a...fight with Joe"

So much for lying. I could never lie to him.

"Oh, are you ok Sunshine? He is a jerk if he hurt you..."

He trailed off. Sometimes I hope that maybe we share the same feelings. Then my hope becomes crushed when I see Chad Dylan Cooper, biggest player ever, my best friend by the way, kiss his arm candy.

"Anyway, don't worry about me Chad. Shouldn't you go to your set anyway? Portlyn or Chastity might be waiting you know." I said bitterly. I knew we were friends but it still...hurt. Like hell. Like someone dropped the world on me and I got stuck underneath it.

"Ok, Sonny what's wrong?"

"Nothing Chad! Just leave, go AWAY!"

He looked at me, really looked at me. In my brown eyes. Chocolate met sea. And for a split second I saw this worried look on his face. Like my eyes were playing my life. Like he was watching a scary movie, in this case my life.

"Allison Isabella Monroe" He finally choked out. I ran away before I even heard him cry out my name.

**Did you guys like it? Please review! They make my sunny day moreee sunnier :)**

**And you guys can check out my Selena Gomez BDAY!(LOVE HER!) VİD ON YOUTUBE! My username is xChannyLover885345x! And my new one-shot life goes on! Love ya guysss...;)**


	3. Chapter 3

**I cant believe I'm uploading the third chapter...Right after the second! Wow! I'm on a rolll and no one can stop me!**

Sonny POV:

I went to my dressing room, more like ran there, and opened the door to see Tawni sitting in her chair, putting on lip gloss. Tawni Hart is so pretty and perfect, I could never be like her. She is one of the most famous people in the world. I would kill to be like her. To have her looks and life.

"Hey Sonny! Marshall said he wanted to see you in his office." Her tone was very dry and low. It almost scared me to near her now.

_Knock Knock Knock_

"Come in!" I heard Marshall say. I went in to find him sitting in his desk, writing some kind of paper. It was weird. He looked consantrated and busy.

"Ah, Sonny, come, have a seat." I did not like his tone either.

"Well, Sonny, I have some things I want to talk to you about."

"Like what?" I quickly replied. I dont want him getting the impression that I dont want to be here, even though I dont.

"I am so sorry to report this to you but gave me orders." I was starting to get scared now. What was he talking about?

"Sonny, you are off So Random!" With that sentence, the whole office became silent. I was trying so hard to fight the tears back, but they were thretaning to fall anyways. I dont want Marshall to see my cry.

"W-Why?" I choked out, on the verge of tears.

"Mr. Condor said the ratings are going down because of your...emo strories on magazines. Parents are not letting kids watch the show anymore." I couldn't believe it! I was getting fired because of stupid stories on magazines!

"Look Sonny, if it was my choice, I would let you stay, I'm sorry it had to come to this. Please dont make a big deal out of it." Big deal? Big DEAL? My whole life was being ripped apart and he wants me to act like it is no _BİG DEAL_?

"You have the rest of the day to clean out your stuff and leave" I hear him say. But I cant see his expression out of the blur of my tears. I storm out of the office.

"Sonny, are you ok?" Tawni asks.

" What is wrong Sonny? I have never seen you so un-Sonny in my life." Nico and Grady say, trying to make a joke out of it. Zora just looks at me like she knows whats going on.

"I'm fired." I say. They all look at me astonished, except Zora. She must have been crawling aaround the vents.

"Sonny, I'm so so sorry! I cant believe all this time I wanted you to go, and know, when you are going, I dont!" Tawni said, with her big blue eyes.

"Sonny, were going to miss you very much. I'm also talking for Grady because he is to upset to talk right now." I smiled at what Nico said and hugged all of them. zOra did not say anything but hugged me the hardest.

"Guys, I love you so much, but I guess it was time for me to go anyways. The stories in the magazines are pushing me towards going back to Wisconsin. I'm going back to our dressing room to pack,k?"

They all nodded. No one could say anything or make any noise. I was the one getting fired, but it was like the whole how was being cancelled.

"Well, I guess that is the last of my things." I put my picture with Tawni inside the last box. She looks at me with teary eyes. Everyone does. I hug all of them. I kiss all of them.

"Dont you guys ever forget me, ok? I love you..." I say and close the door to Tawni Hart's dressing room.

Chad POV:

I need a little bit of fresh air. This morning with Sonny was weird enough but now I had to kiss Portyln? If MF was not the reason fo my being famaous, I would have ditched drama anyday.

I go outside and inhale the fresh air. Mmmmmm! Thats good. Wait, who is that? I see a girl, a brunnete, lunging around a suitcase and putting a few boxes into her car. Her Mercedes. I know only one person who has that Mercedes.

"Sonny!" I scream. She looks behind her to see me.

"Chad" She says, slowly and quietly.

"What's wrong Sonny?" I ask. She looks upset. It nearly breaks mt heart.

"I'm leaving Chad. I'm leaving So Random! and LA. I'm going back to Wisconsin."

I nearly die there. She cant go back to Wisonsin! I love her so much and I can never get the chance to say it to her!

"I-"

"Dont say anything Chad, I'm sorry, I have to go." She cutts me off. I see her driving untill her car vanishes out of my sight.

**Did you like it? Do you like me for uploadin it faster? You do right! Virtual milk and cookies to everyone who reviews :) **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hola people of FanFiction! How are you? How are your parents? How is your pet? Are your socks clean...enough? Ok, done with the weird questions but I havent been online for a while. But I have been having trouble with my story. No, I dont have any writers block and NO! I am not cancelling this story...yet. I mean I wrote three (tres,3) chapters and I only have 10 reviews that are all for chapter 1 and 2. I mean I had atleast a few people fave and alert but would it kill for you to review a bit? I guess I wont update untill I get 15 reviews. I can wait, seriously I love wrting but I want to have time on my own too. And I'm going on VACATION tommorow! Eeeeep, cant wait! Its this lush paradise where lots of foreners come and there are so many activities. And really hot guys! AnYwAys... What I said is true and when I get back from vacation, I'm gonna check my mails and see if I got my wish! No, I'm not gonna check my mails on vacation, sorry guys! So, have a great day and dont forget to review! 15, 15, 15 ,15...15, 15,...**

**-MaRy**


	5. Chapter 5

**Ok guys, I wasn't gonna post this today but because I promised, here ya go! Read and Review Please!**

Chad POV:

_Flight for Wisconsin boarding in 15 minutes._

That's me. Sonny better be ready to see me because I'm not so sure I am ready to see her. Sure, I have missed her like crazy and my life for the last 3 months have been consisted of sleepless nights and shedded tears. But after 3 months, I have decided to fly to Wisconsin to surprise my Sunshine.

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

_**Flashback**_

"_Tawni, please tell me Sonny went for a lunch break and she will be coming back in a few hours."_

_I sounded so idiotic but I did not care. Tawni opened her perfectly glossed lips:_

"_You didn't hear." She said. Hear what?_

"_Hear what?" She looked at me, tears welling up in her eyes. Why was Tawni crying?_

"_Chad, Sonny got fired earlier this morning."_

_I stormed into Marshall's office, furious._

"_Why the fucking hell have you fired Sonny?" I screamed into his face. He looked shocked._

"_Look Chad-"_

"_Don't you dare "Look Chad" me you son of a bitch! Tell me why you fired her!" I cut him off. No one was going to fire Sonny right under my nose and get away with it._

"_Chad, I didn't fire Sonny. Mr. Condor gave me orders because Sonny's inappropriate stories were spreading around and around and it was too much for a kids show to handle."_

"_That's why you fired HER? Because of a fucking story on a fucking MAGAZINE? Everyone knows their fake!" I was too angry to argue a bit more with this man. I went out the exact way I came in._

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

After that, of course I quit my job. I'm not working my ass of at a place that fired my love. I could never stand it. And now is the time.

_3 hours later…._

The plane ride was the most stressful plane ride I have ever been on. It does not help that I'm not a big fan of heights either. The driver picked me up from the airport and I, Chad Dylan Cooper, former star of the hit drama and the stealer of girls hearts, is sitting in my limo, thinking of what to say when I first see my best friend in 3 months. Her silky, shiny brunette hair, equally gorgeous chocolate Brown eyes you could just melt in and her pretty toothy smile I missed seeing. Come to think of it, it has been a while since I saw her _real_ smile_._

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

_Flashback_

" _What's wrong Sunshine?" I asked, worried. She seemed down. She was like this for a few weeks now. I really wonder what's wrong._

"_Nothing Chad, I already told you, please stop asking me this!" She got mad at me. She gets mad at me really quickly these days._

"_Sonny please listen, I'm just worried about you, you don't seem like yourself these days." I told her the truth. She has to hear it._

"_Ugh, Chad! What are you my boyfriend? Stop meddling in my personal life! Please." That hurt. It killed me inside. Of course I'm not her boyfriend. She's dating the amaz__ing rock star Joe Lucas._

"_Sonny, I'm your best frıend! I'm just trying to help! Its not my choice that you're acting like a miserable idiot!" I wish I never had said that to her._

"_Idiot ha? Just go to hell Chad! Just go!"_

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

After that argument I had with her, I felt horrible for days. My stomach felt empty and whenever I wanted to call her, I could never dial. But I made it up to her buying a necklace shaped as a sun for her.

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

_Flashback_

"_Oh my gosh Chad, this is so beautiful!" Sonny gushed. Something she barely ever does anymore._

"_I'm so so sorry for what I said earlier and I wanted to make it up to you." I said. She had to believe me. I wasn't lying, not this time._

"_I forgive you Chad." She hugged me. I wanted to hold on to her forever._

"_Sonny, I have something to tell you." This was it. I have to tell her how I feel, or I'm never going to have the chance._

"_Sure Chad."_

"_I lo-"_

"_You know, Joe got me a necklace too! Guess I'm getting very lucky these days!" She cut me off. Joe? Really? That guy is ruining every little chance I have with the love of my life._

"_Of course Joe got you a necklace. He is after all your boyfriend." I said. I hesitated saying that word after Joe Lucas._

"_Yeah, he is. So, what were you going to tell me again?" She asked. The moment is gone._

"_Never mind. Nothing important."_

"_Oh"_

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

I finally reached the Monroe household in Wisconsin. I have a yellow rose and a charm for her charm bracelet. I hope Sonny opens the door.

_Knock-Knock_

The doors handle twitched. This is it. The door opened and to see Sonny there I saw a red, puffy eyed Connie Monroe. She looked at me, tears started welling up in her eyes and she closed her mouth with her hand to stop the sobs from coming out. She took out a letter from her pocket. It was white, crumpled and dirty. It said "Dear Chad" on it. I froze. Where was Sonny? I opened the letter.

_**Dear Chad,**_

_**I know you will never ever forgive me for this, but I don't need forgiveness anymore. I believe every one has time on this earth. And my time had run out. If you are reading this, I'm long gone. And everything I do has gone with me. I need to tell you the truth Chad. I love you more that you could ever know. I know you never felt the same way and I'm sorry we never got the chance to be together.**__** I hope that one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me. And that day, you will look up to the empty sky and see me. I will always be there, no matter what. Don't follow me. Live your life, as it is Chad. I am so so so sorry.". -Allison Isabella Monroe**__**.**_

Allison Isabelle has left the face of the earth. She left her show and friends. She left her country and family. But worst of all, she left me, Chad.


	6. Chapter 6

**Heyyoooo! How are you guys? Well, im goooooood! Just getting into shape, school just started :( But no worries, its going great. I actually love my school (except those damn lessons). But I decided that I should reward myself by writing a new chapter and if I say so myself, its pretty good! But I still have a problem with reviews…..I have over 4 very hard written chapters and only 22 reviews. Im not ungratefull of all the faves and alerts but guys; would it kill you to say a few words of wisdom (lol) about my story. I mean, I work days on it and I only get like 4 reviews. And if I don't get any reviews, Im gonna cancel. I really like this story and I just got to the biggest part of the story (BTW the reminds me, this is the BIG chapter! Hope u like my twist) and I really wanna continue but Im not if no one will review. So please please PLEASE, IM BEGGING YOU, review :)**

My life has never been worse. I can't eat. Every time I even try to put anything in my mouth, I can't swallow. I end up choking my food out. I can't sleep. Lying in bed, looking at the white ceiling thinking, what did I do wrong? Was it my fault? Should I have told her how I felt? All the times we spent together come flooding back into my memory, making me shed a tear. Chad Dylan Cooper doesn't cry. But Chad does. Chad always does. I try to think about something else but her. I tried watching TV a few times but whenever I start watching a channel either its re-runs of So Random! or news about Sonny's death. Her death went public after Connie reviled it. The paparazzi flood the house every day. They don't know I'm here. Connie let me stay in her house until I get myself back together. And I still don't know when that is.

I go into the living room and turn on the TV. I've decided not to sulk around, wishing she was here because I know I've lost her forever. I get the remote and start changing the channels, trying to find something to watch. This time of the day its mostly kids cartoons. Not that I mind Tom&Jerry and such but I just don't feel like it. I stop at a channel. A news channel. "Miss Monroe's corpse has been observed by several doctors and has come to the conclusion that it was a murder**(did not see that one coming! U like the twist?)**. Miss Monroe was shot the night her Mrs. Monroe found her on the kitchen floor. No further information is known. If you saw Miss Monroe on the night of March 7th, please contact us." Wh-what? Sonny was murdered! In the letter, she states that she killed herself. But this stupid news channel states differently.

_**Ring Ring**_

"Hello?"

"_Have you heard?_" It was Connie.

"He-heard what exactly?" Of course I knew what she meant but I secretly hoped it was something else.

"_Sonny, on the news_." She sounded upset. Very upset.

"Well, yes, they say it was a...mur-murder." There was silence on the line. Finally, Connie broke it. Her voice was calm but it sounded like she was going to cry any minute.

"_It's not possible but I went to the emergency room today. They say it's definitely a murder and that she was shot_."

"But Sonny clearly stated that she was going to commit suicide! How could she write me a goodbye letter then get murdered?" I practically shouted to the phone. To my surprise, Connie was still calm.

"_I don't know Chad_." Great! I hung up the phone.

I go into my room. The Monroe house in Wisconsin is rather big and Connie let me stay in the guest room. Its ordinary, a bed and a bedside table, a white desk and a bathroom. The room is painted beige and the curtains drape over the windows very... well, clingy. I change over to my pajamas. I always wear these PJs because they were Sonny's favorite.

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

_**Flashback**_

_"Chad!" Sonny shrieked. They were on the couch in Chad's house. Chad was on top of Sonny, tickling her. Sonny was giggling uncontrollably and Chad was getting a kick out of it._

_"What Sonny?" Chad asked, so innocent, but he was trying to muffle his laughs too._

_"St-sot itttt!" Sonny said through giggles._

_"Fine" Chad replied, looking defeated._

_"Fine!"_

_"Good!"_

_"Good!"_

_"So we good?"_

_"Oh, were so good!" And with that, they both started to laugh._

_"C'mon Chad, its getting late and we have to get up early tomorrow. Let's go to bed." Sonny and Chad were having their usual sleepover and it was Chad's turn to host it._

_"Ok, c'mon, and you can help pick which PJ I'm going to wear because CDC needs to look good during his beauty sleep" Chad said, fixing his hair._

_"What a girl" Sonny muttered under her breath._

_"What was that?"_

_"Nothing" She looked down._

_After going through a bazillion PJs, Sonny finally picked one that wasn't to "fancy" or too "gay". It was a sleeveless grey top with army shorts under it. It was probably the most comfortable PJ in there._

_"That one!" Sonny said._

_"Oh god, finally!" And with that, he went in the bathroom and got changed._

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

After that, I always wore that PJ in our sleepovers and it became our fave. Everything of that PJ reminded me of her. The fabric, the scent, the way it felt on my skin... I remember how she felt on my skin. It was sweet. It was everything. Like milk and honey. I could hug her, scratch that, I could touch her and I would never ever let go. I sometimes think about the times we spent fighting over a stupid thing, instead of enjoying the company.

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

_**Flashback**_

_"You are stupid Chad! And you know what? You are a jerk! And you don't deserve anything you get!" Sonny was furious by the time she realized what Chad did._

_"Oh common Sonny, you're getting mad over a stupid thing! I just scared him off because I knew he wasn't good for you! Don't you get it?" _

_"No Chad, that's not for you too decide! I can make my own decisions and you are not in one of them!" Sonny said the last line in disgust._

_Chad looked hurt. Very hurt. "Fine." He said and left the car._

**ø,¸¸,ø¤º¤ø,¸¸,ø**

Oh how I wish I was modest then and hugged her. Because I love her so so much. And who ever shot her, you may wanna sleep with one eye open...

**Soooooo? How was it? I really liked how I changed it. Originally, Sonny killed herself and maybe she still did, u never know unless u review…..:)**


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